Saturday, September 30, 2006

George Allen's Reign Of Mail Terror

Today in the mail I received a letter outlining yet another outrage against the U.S. Postal Service by Sen. George Allen. This time leveled by his own sister, Jennifer Allen!

Just a warning, the following is not to be read by those of sensitive constitutions. (This means you, Ma)

In a recently published book, “Fifth Quarter: The Scrimmage of a Football Coach's Daughter” (buy it here and have it delivered by U.S. Mail in as little as three days.), Jennifer wites of a neighbor’s mailbox saying it
lay smashed in the street, a casualty of my brothers' drive-by to school in the morning. George would swerve his Mach II Mustang while Gregory held a baseball bat out the window to clear the mailbox off its post. . . .
And as if this weren’t bad enough:
“the Packers fan had resorted to stapling a Kleenex box to the mailbox post to receive his mail. George's red Mustang screeched up beside us, the Packers fan's Kleenex mailbox speared on the antenna.”
Even when the neighbor was forced to use a wholly unapproved mail receptacle, George Allen still refused to stop his tide of violence against the sacred and ancient service of letter delivery.

As the evidence mounts, will no authority act to stem this tide of mailbox terrorism?

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